Sunday, July 31, 2005

Monday again

It’s “Black Monday” again tomorrow. I’m sitting in my room, in front of my laptop with heavy eyelids effects from the cough medication I just took. Bile la batuk ni nak baik.

I once said that since I don’t really have the time to update my blog all the time, I’ll be doing it once a week. Since I’d rather stay home on Sundays, I fill up my time writing for my blog. Then when Monday comes, I’ll be able to copy and paste what I’ve written during lecture in the lab (which I have, first period Monday morning =P). Hehehe..

So here I am again, cracking up my head on what to write. Actually, I’ve never had any problem with writing anything. If I have a topic of discussion, I’ll certainly have something to write about.

Hmm.. tonite, I think I’ll comment on something the President of the Alumni of AIM (En. Fauzan) said to me during the meeting earlier today. Near the end of the meeting, he asked everyone around the table whether there was anything. When he came to me, he recognized my face, which has been in and out of the administration office lots of times. Anyhow, I didn’t mind him asking for my name again. But what bothered me and made my skin crawl was the question he asked me after that.

“So, macamane rasa dapat award? Ape nama awardnye..? Chancellor Award”

Fuh.. I felt my heart slam into my ribs. In my head dozens of questions arose, my heart pumped a little harder, and I was kinda breathless. I didn’t answer his question, coz truthfully I don’t know whether I got the award or not. What award am I talking about here? I’m referring to the Chancellor Award during the coming Convocation.

I kept quiet. But I answered him with wide questioning eyes. Everyone was looking at me, so they saw my reaction. Then everyone macam cover balik. En Fauzan said something like “Eh ye ke.. tak tahu lagi kan? Amirah ni antara calon-calon die la kan”. Kak Put who was beside me pun cover2 as the rest like Kak Zan and Kak Ila (All from the admin).

Ya Allah.. these guys are so suspicious. This wasn’t the first time. There were lots of other incidences. But all ending up with no one giving a specific answer but giving out speculations. Oh mann.. this is so agonizing.

All I ask is people not putting their hopes too high. I’ve let down mine. Coz for me, whoever gets the award deserves it. He/She worked for it and that’s the rezeki Allah bestowed upon him/her. I don’t really mind who gets it, in fact I’d love to get to know them. It’s always an honor knowing the role model student among the whole UNIKL. I might even get tips for myself. Hehe..

But again, rezeki tu kat tangan masing2. However high my hopes are, I leave it all to Allah. If he wants me to receive the award, then so be it. I just wish these people would announce the recipients soon. It’s so excruciating not knowing.

However, it would be wonderful if I were to receive it. Ahh.. Seeing my parents during graduation, and knowing they’re proud of me. Showing off my parents to my lecturers and friends, who will comment on how young my parents are. Hehe.. and seeing Mak and Ayah’s wide smile with all the congrats thrown their way. Sigh.. it would be such a beautiful picture kan?

Some things in life are just priceless.

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