Sunday, July 31, 2005

Monday again

It’s “Black Monday” again tomorrow. I’m sitting in my room, in front of my laptop with heavy eyelids effects from the cough medication I just took. Bile la batuk ni nak baik.

I once said that since I don’t really have the time to update my blog all the time, I’ll be doing it once a week. Since I’d rather stay home on Sundays, I fill up my time writing for my blog. Then when Monday comes, I’ll be able to copy and paste what I’ve written during lecture in the lab (which I have, first period Monday morning =P). Hehehe..

So here I am again, cracking up my head on what to write. Actually, I’ve never had any problem with writing anything. If I have a topic of discussion, I’ll certainly have something to write about.

Hmm.. tonite, I think I’ll comment on something the President of the Alumni of AIM (En. Fauzan) said to me during the meeting earlier today. Near the end of the meeting, he asked everyone around the table whether there was anything. When he came to me, he recognized my face, which has been in and out of the administration office lots of times. Anyhow, I didn’t mind him asking for my name again. But what bothered me and made my skin crawl was the question he asked me after that.

“So, macamane rasa dapat award? Ape nama awardnye..? Chancellor Award”

Fuh.. I felt my heart slam into my ribs. In my head dozens of questions arose, my heart pumped a little harder, and I was kinda breathless. I didn’t answer his question, coz truthfully I don’t know whether I got the award or not. What award am I talking about here? I’m referring to the Chancellor Award during the coming Convocation.

I kept quiet. But I answered him with wide questioning eyes. Everyone was looking at me, so they saw my reaction. Then everyone macam cover balik. En Fauzan said something like “Eh ye ke.. tak tahu lagi kan? Amirah ni antara calon-calon die la kan”. Kak Put who was beside me pun cover2 as the rest like Kak Zan and Kak Ila (All from the admin).

Ya Allah.. these guys are so suspicious. This wasn’t the first time. There were lots of other incidences. But all ending up with no one giving a specific answer but giving out speculations. Oh mann.. this is so agonizing.

All I ask is people not putting their hopes too high. I’ve let down mine. Coz for me, whoever gets the award deserves it. He/She worked for it and that’s the rezeki Allah bestowed upon him/her. I don’t really mind who gets it, in fact I’d love to get to know them. It’s always an honor knowing the role model student among the whole UNIKL. I might even get tips for myself. Hehe..

But again, rezeki tu kat tangan masing2. However high my hopes are, I leave it all to Allah. If he wants me to receive the award, then so be it. I just wish these people would announce the recipients soon. It’s so excruciating not knowing.

However, it would be wonderful if I were to receive it. Ahh.. Seeing my parents during graduation, and knowing they’re proud of me. Showing off my parents to my lecturers and friends, who will comment on how young my parents are. Hehe.. and seeing Mak and Ayah’s wide smile with all the congrats thrown their way. Sigh.. it would be such a beautiful picture kan?

Some things in life are just priceless.

Saturday, July 30, 2005

Convo.. here we come

I can’t believe there’s only two weeks to go till my convocation. With everyone talking about it here and there, I find myself having butterflies in my stomach as days pass by. I can’t really explain how I feel, coz it’s a new wondrous feeling. I’ve never felt like this before. It feels like something from deep inside, just ready to burst with excitement. It’s just like being a small kid, anxious to open a birthday present to see what’s inside.

My friends and I have already settled our Convo fees. Plus the fees for our exclusive robes. I first felt this excitement feeling start when me, Ju and Fad went to pay up at the HQ office the other day. It suddenly seems so real. I donno why I never thought it WAS real before.

Oh God, you do not know how eager I am. With the Convo being at Bukit Jalil and all. Best giler! Heheheh.. Sorry, just being silly.

Anyway, as I told you guys a few posts back, I already have a special baju kurung just for this gala occasion. I called mak yesterday, terlupa nak bagitahu yang my baju dah siap kat tailor and she had to pick it up. Rupanya mak dah ambik dah pun. Fuhh.. legaaa, coz the receipt was with me. Takut tailor tu tak ingat yang mane. =P

Then I found out that I don’t have a tudung to match my new baju. Alaaaa..
Hehe.. you know how girls wanna look their best! Macam tak tahu pulak =P

I want my Convo to be perfect. =) hehe.. I have a new baju, new tudung (which I have to buy in two weeks) and new SHOES! Yeaaahhh.. Thanks Aliya for the new boots. Sorry you had to go all over Melbourne in search for it. I owe you one. Eh, but wait, we’re EVEN! ;) *wink. I haven’t seen the boots yet, but thank you anyway. I hope it didn’t cost that much. Hehe.. You know me and my expensive taste. =P

Oh I just can’t wait. I donno why ramai yang not as enthusiastic as me. When I say “eiii, seronoknye nak konvo!” They’ll dampen my spirits with something like “Ala, awk boleh la nak seronok, pointer tinggi”. Laaaaaaaaaa.. sbr je la.

It’s not like they’re gonna announce your pointer on the stage. (I don’t think they’re gonna announce our NAME for that matter) We’re going up there as graduates, no matter how high or how low our pointer is. Convocation is OUR day. A day to celebrate US. You should be HAPPY. Not think negative like that. I don’t get la these people.

Seriously, these are the times that people can’t wait for in life. =) Getting a scroll after years of fighting up the ladder of success. All worthwhile.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Mural Painting..

Something interesting happened last week. UNIKL IIM was invited to do some murals at St. John’s Primary School located near Bukit Nenas. There were nearly 40 students altogether who were involved, most of them from Animation. We were to produce four murals, all coloured and completed in two days, which personally I think is too short.

However, two days passed by and alhamdulillah everything was done. Looking at what they produced, I am very proud and impressed with the end results of hard work and exhaustion.
I’ll fill in some pictures when I get the chance. It was a wonderful experience coz everyone worked as a team, a solitary body. We were able to feel each others presence and become closer as we completed the job at hand.
Oh yeah, I nearly forgot.. We were to do this mural bcoz Hishamuddin was coming to the school for a community gotong-royong last Saturday. It was going to be published in the paper and all. I’ll look for the news about it later.

Till next time, over and out =)

Monday, July 25, 2005

Black Mondays

Monday. A day which usually brings out big sighs from everyone. Everyone HATES Mondays. That’s why phrases like “Black Mondays” are formed.

It’s been a while, I haven’t really had the time to write, that’s why I type everything and upload it in my blog sekali gus.

Last weekend, I was required to go to a Seminar organized by Kelab-kelab UMNO Luar Negara. A letter was sent to my university, requesting members of the SRC to attend, so 5 of us went. It was held at Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka. The title of the Seminar was “Agenda Melayu”.

I went there solely to get the experience of meeting Dato’ Seri Najib Tun Razak. Haha.. At least dapat experience. Boleh lah bagitahu org, that I’ve met Najib. =P Oh yeah, did I mention it was on TV as well? Hahaha..

At first, we all tersesat kat DBP tu. Haha.. I didn’t know the way, so just relying on a map drawn by Kak Diela, tawakkal je lah. YaAllah, that’s an experience I’ll never forget. Only the people in the car with me at that time would understand what I mean ;)

Ok, so we arrived at DBP right on time. Dah masuk car park, naik lift. Guess who I saw? AWLA! Hahaha.. Of all the people to bump into. She’s the least expected person for me to bump into coz as far as I know, she’s in Kuantan, rite? Haha.. But it was a pleasurable “bump-into”.

At first I thought she was in KL for the Seminar I was to attend, rupanya she had another program. If I’m not mistaken, it was about Astora Jabat. Kan Awla? How was the programme?

Oh okey, back to my story. We all had to daftar, then went upstairs into the grand hall, which was grand I tell you. Of course la, Najib nak datang.. red carpet and all. All the representatives from IPTs had to sit at the back. We didn’t really have time to mingle about (even though that’s exactly what Ms Put pesan suruh buat).

After 45minutes waiting, finally Najib came, and the ceremony started. His officiating speech was interesting. It had some good points. But generally the seminar was about Melayu. About how we have to stay together and all.

The perasmian was a first for me. It was cool. After Najib’s speech, there was a recitation of a poem, with background music (which was really effective!), then came the pendekar2 bringing the keris to be put on the stage. It was COOL!

There were a lot of cameras there, from TV3, etc. We all found ourselves sitting up straight and smiling every time the cameras focused our way. Malu la kalau tiba2 masuk TV nampak tengah tido! Hahahah..

From my experience doing to seminars like this, usually the most interesting part is the sesi soal jawab. And from my experience also, usually it’s the IPT Students yang suka tanye soalan2 maut ni. But shockingly, this time most of the questions and comments came from the “veterans”.

Anyhow, kitorg semua bangga when the menteri Pengajian Tinggi mentioned our University during his forum speech. Bangga la kejap =P. Rupanya dah famous UNIKL nih. Hehehe..

The seminar was supposed to end at 6.30p.m. But we all went back during lunch. The forum before lunch had relevance to us as students, but after looking at the agenda, after lunch there’d be a forum on economy and politic. So we all decided to go back rather than indulge ourselves in the political issues.

Although setengah hari je pegi, we still consider it as experience. =).. walaupun mengelat sikit. Hehehe..

Self-changes

Right after the “incident” I mentioned before this, I realized something. I’ve changed a LOT. Today Kak Put asked me, “Mira, pernah tak mira terfikir, mira dah berubah?”. I thought about it for a while, and the answer is yes. I have changed a lot.

Then she asked me, “Pernah tak terfikir, siapa yang buat mira berubah?”. Wau, good question. I have to think about that one.

During the drive home, I thought about it. And I’d say that there is a specific person who “encouraged” this change in me. Name? I don’t see the relevance of mentioning it.

I think this change happened approximately 5 months 2 weeks and 4 days ago.

People always say we need to Muhasabah ourselves. That’s exactly what I did today. I used to be the reserved kind of person. If I was sad, I’d keep it to myself. If I was angry, I’d be angry alone. I’d only show people the “happy go lucky” side of me. But now, after all that has happened, I have learned to express myself, tak kira marah ke, suka ke, sedih or even irritated.

I no longer have this “scared” feeling of confronting someone I’m angry with. I no longer feel weak at the knees; no longer have butterflies in my stomach. But I straight away say what I think and feel.

I also realized the fact that I’ve grown to be sarcastic when I want to. Many have felt the nasty and biting comments I’ve voiced out since. I’m sorry if those people feel weird around me now, but you actually deserved such comments. I just stated out the truth. And you know how sometimes, the truth hurts.


Yeah, I guess I have changed. But changes are sometimes for the better. We shouldnt really try to see the negative side of it, but try and make do.

I hope to update my blog frequently, but seems like i dont have the appropriate time. But, I will try.

SO IGNORANT MAAA..

Friendship week is a usual week practiced by the students of our campus. Usually, it is organized to the end of the semester, but this time its done at the beginning of the semester.

I forgot to mention that my term as a member of the SRC belum habis lagi. And since Bomba tak sambung study, I’ll have to act as a replacement. Pemangku President of the SRC. At first, the post sounded SO HEAVY! But, I must be confident in myself. I must do this task as best I can. With the team behind me, InsyaAllah I can do this.

So our first project is this coming Friendship Week. We’re already busy actually. Last week I think we had 2 meetings already. But disappointingly, only two-three people yang ikut dateline. Haiyaa.. These people like to do things last minute. Don’t they ever learn? Dah 4 semesters pun tak reti jugak. Sabar je la.

Then something happened on Wednesday.. or should I say “incident”. It started like this, last Wednesday we were to have a meeting during lunch hour. The night before, the vice II smsd me and said that he wanted the key for our new MP room tomorrow morning coz he wanted to “hiaskan”.. Since the key that I had was the ONLY key for that particular room, I told him to jaga btul2. This boy selalu cari pasal, so I siap pesan three times kat die. I wanted to trust him, but I still had this reluctant feeling.

Rupa2nya that uneasy feeling ade penyebabnye.. Lahai.. I think you can guess what happened. He locked himself outside. Duh! So, a few hours after that, he smsd me saying he wanted to see me.. “Ade benda URGENT” katanya.

“Kak Miraaaa.. saye terkunci bilik MP tu, kunci die ade kat dalam. Camne ni akak??” YaAllah.. angin btul la budak nih. At that time, I was just so damn irritated. Ape hal budak nih, I don’t get it why he’s the only one yang suka cari pasal. Yang lain okey je, what is wrong with this boy?

So I just said “Akak tak kira awk selesaikan mcmane. Yang akak tahu, 1230 ade meeting”. Then I left him there to deal with the problem himself. He’s old enough to think.

Or so I thought…

Since I was so irritated, I went to En Kasman the Student Activity Supervisor and asked him if this boy came and told him anything. When he said no, I told him what happened. Haa.. you’ll never guess what happened after that. En Kasman put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a familiar bunch of keys. Terkejut jugak, how the heck did En Kasman get those keys. “Mira, saye jumpa kunci ni betul2 kat tombol pintu bilik MP tu. Nasib baik saye yang jumpa, kalau org lain?”

Astaghfirullahalazim..

1230 came and I went upstairs to see the door was already opened. When I asked him how he opened it, he said “Saya panjat bumbung tau akak”. Hish, sampai ke situ? I didn’t ask further. At the end of the meeting, he gave out keys to the others. It was kind of a weird gesture so I asked him; “How much did it cost to duplicate the keys?” He answered, “Alah, seringgit lebih je akak”.

The next day, I met syafiq in front of the MP room to settle a few things concerning this coming Friendship Week. So as usual I took out the key En Kasman gave me yesterday and to my surprise, it wouldn’t fit the key hole. “Eh, kenapa nampak pelik je this tombol?” I asked to myself. I tried every single key that was in my bunch of keys but none of them fit.

I asked Syafiq to call the Guard.. Yelah, manelah tahu ade org Admin tukar. Org admin naik atas, even the guard naik, but no one knew anything about the new tombol. Suddenly “this boy” popped into my mind. Terus I called him. “Where are you?! Akak nak kunci bilik. Naik sekarang jugak!”, I said with a high voice. I was starting to become angry.
When he arrived, he opened the door. The first thing that came out of Syafiq and my mouth was “Amboiii.. sukahati je awk tukar tombol eh”. Die boleh tersenyum sipu2 kat situ. Lagi buat mira geram. Then I asked him straight out, “Cuba bagitahu ape sbnrnye jadi semalam?”

I listened to this hilarious tale of him terkunci kat luar coz he wanted to see how the new curtains on the door looked from outside. (EXCUSE ME??) Then he said, bile dah terkunci tu, die pun panjat la bumbung. When he found out the key wasn’t in the room, die pun terpaksa tukar tombol. Ya Allah.. after that I was SO DAMN ANGRY! Boleh lagi die tipu kite bulat2 kat depan mata!

Then I straight away gave him the trashing he deserved. Die sendiri tertinggal kunci tu kat tombol pintu, he can say die terkunci kat luar sbb nak tengok langsir. Can’t you see the way he wanted to save his butt by lying? I actually raised my voice right there n then. I was even surprised at myself. I’ve never been known to marah like that.

Ok, let me list out the contradictions I found in his story;
1) First he said he locked himself outside, sbb nak tengok langsir. If that’s true, then how the heck did En Kasman find the keys at the tombol pintu.. Get the picture?
2) Second, he would be silly to close that door just to see the langsir coz die tak tutup pun boleh nampak.
3) Third, how the heck did he climb the bumbung with his rather large body? Tak ke patah tengkok kalau jatuh? Dan tak logic. Papan ceiling tu bukannye made out of stone. Its just a piece of thin cardboard. Camne pulak boleh panjat??
4) Four, kalau btul die tukar tombol, why the heck didn’t he tell us during the meeting?? Kalau iye pun, bagitahu laaa. Ni tak, senyap je.
5) Five, why the heck did he lie when I asked him how much it cost to duplicate the key??!

I think he thought he could get away with it. But like I told my friends “Sepandai2 tupai melompat, akhirnya jatuh ke tanah juga”. Allah will always reveal the bad things people do. Don’t think you’ll get away with such things.

I was so angry, to the point I said he was careless, and that I put my trust in him to take care of the key. A key is just a small thing okey. Then I told him, if something so small as a key pun tak boleh nak responsible, how the heck am I supposed to trust him to do something bigger??! Oh God, I totally gave it all out. The thing that made me angrier was the fact that he could lie right in my face. The nerve.

Right now, him and his “gang” of friends duk menjeling2 me. Eh, come on la. So immature la. I don’t give a damn. Such acts, mirrors the fact that he’s still a kid inside and doesn’t wanna grow up. It also shows how much he is still trying to defend himself. Still tanak mengaku salah.

Makes me wonder what other things he’s lied about.

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim..

I start this post with Bismillah bcoz this is the first post since I’ve been in KL. For those who don’t know, I am not in KL continuing my journey up the ladder of my life goal. I’m now a second year student, taking Bachelor of Multimedia Technologies (Hons) in Interactive Multimedia Design. It sounds so exclusive doesn’t it? =P

Anyhow, I’ve been here two weeks already. Sorry for not updating, but it’s been kinda hectic. This semester I would be taking 7 subjects which carry 18 credit hours. Until now, I only have one totally project based subject. I know how those would sound easy, but don’t be fooled. Its these kind of subjects which are hard to score.

What actually has been happening here in KL? Not much to tell really. Registration day was a blast! Coz I met up with all my friends whom I haven’t seen in 6 months. There were a lot of hugging and laughing. =) So much fun.

Then came the orientation. It was a relief that the degree students didn’t have to undergo the orientation week again. Fuh.. if not, for sure the OC would ‘bully’ us. But as if diorg berani pun! Haha.. I tagged along supervising the 40 highly potential members of the Orientation Committee. Its always fun watching new faces and making new friends.

The week after that, we were divided into our respected classes. I’m in class One which consists of 50% new external students. Am I unlucky or what! Oklaa.. I can make new friends, but come on laa.. =( Nasib baik Ocha same class with me, kalau tak tercungap-cungap la saye kat situ.

Oh ye, I forgot to mention.. the degree courses, ade yang ade kelas until 8p.m. My God! 8 p.m. ok folks. Thank God I have a car. I pity the ones who have to take the bus. Balik malam2 tuh.

Its just been a week, but I’ve already got 3 major assignments.. Waaaaa… when we voiced objections, guess what the lecturers’ said..? “WELCOME TO DEGREE COURSE” with a mischievous smile. Oh Mannn..!

Pray for me okey.

Friday, July 01, 2005

12.. 11.. 10.. and counting..

In another 10 hours, I’ll be on my way back to the-ever-busy-and-noisy-KL. Well, a part of me has this huge enthusiasm to go back. The other half just dreads it.

I haven’t really finished packing my stuff.. Never knew I had tons of things!

Aimi keeps repeating “Alaa.. lepas ni kakngah dah takde dah” and every time she says that, my gutt hurts. As much as I’d love to see my friends and hang out, I’ll still be missing my family and the times we all share together, walaupun only at home.

I’ve been living back home for 6 months and everyone has gotten used to the routine. I don’t know how it’ll go without me. I know Aimi and Aida are gonna miss me menyakat diorg. I also selalu bawak diorg jalan2, and belanja stuff which I know they won’t get to buy with mak =P. So I think they’ll miss those kind of things.

Every time before going to sleep, after the lights are already turned off, I always get in bed next to them and main geletek2. Hehehe.. it’s fun you know. Well, for me anyway; coz I’m doing all the tickling. =P

And I really love the conversations we all have during the half an hour drives’ back from fetching them at school. The laughs, jokes and sharing of secrets. =)

I know the whole family is gonna be sending me to KL, but yet again I dread the time when they’ll start their journey back to JB and leave me. It’s still gonna feel sad; just like the time they left after seeing me settled in the hostel during semester 1. I hate that feeling. I’ll always have unshed tears; which I’ll straight away wipe before anyone sees them.

It’s a good thing I’ll be staying in nenek’s house. I just hate hostels. Seriously. I’ll definitely think again if I was offered. No way. I value my privacy so I don’t think I’ll be able to settle in comfortably. Once is enough. I have so many experiences to last a lifetime! < -- Just being over dramatic =P

I’m not sure how often I’ll be able to update my blog in KL. It depends on how busy I’ll be. But since my laptop has a wireless connection, maybe I’ll be spending more time in restaurants with the facilities for me to eat while surfing. And its gonna be free as well.. hehe.. Cool!

Please pray for me. I need all the support I can get. =) I hope the journey I am about to start would be as wonderful and serine as it was before. InsyaAllah it will give me more experiences and make me stronger facing the tribulations that are heading my way. Ya Allah, I need Your guidance every step of the way.

Back to School

I can’t believe 6 months have already passed. I’ve been staying in JB for 6 months mann! Wau.. it feels so short. However, the things that happened during those 6 months have had a huge impact in my life. But if I was given the chance, I wouldn’t change anything. Especially the breakup.

So here I am today writing on my last day staying home. Tomorrow we’re all off to KL. The whole family is coming along as well to send me. Just a family thing =). And also because someone has to teman me drive all the way to KL. Hehehe.. But still, its just wonderful that everyone cleared their schedules to send me all the way back to face yet another journey. Haha.. Except Aliya of course.. Duh!

Right now, sbnrnye I’m in the process of packing. Truthfully, I just started packing yesterday. I know, I know.. last minute btul packing. Saje je sbnrnye. Somehow, I felt reluctant to bring out the huge suitcase and pack all my clothes. I’m only half finished and the cupboard is already looking empty. The rest to just Aimi’s clothes.

Sedih tu sedih jugak. And the room is now so damn messy. My doing of course. Hehehhe.. I brought out all the boxes, files and documents. So right now I’m sorting them all out. Stuff to bring along, stuff to recycle, stuff to keep in mind, and also stuff to throw out. Hehehe.. During the whole sorting out, I found quite a few things. All my former notes. Even from semester one! And also my exam papers, quizzes and test. Wah.. bangga btul bile tgk balik my marks. Alhamdulillah, I never thought I’d get this far.

Oh I better get back to packing. I have to finish before my sisters get back from school. Kalau tak, habis makin sepah bilik nih. I’ll get back when I feel tired sorting things out =)

Over and out.

Surprise Letter

Oh yes, something exciting happened yesterday. As I arrived home from the ALUMNI AGM, mak presented me with a big envelop which I saw was from UNIKL (due to the logo on the envelop.. duhh! =P)

At first, terkejut jugak. Surat ape lagi UNIKL nak bagi nih. I thought diorg dah bagi dah every borang that I needed to fill in. So with dread, I opened it. And to my surprise… jeng jeng jeng.. it was about my convocation. Yahoooo! Hehehehe..

Inside they sent all the details about this gala event. And you wanna know something?? Guess where they’re gonna do it? STADIUM PUTRA BUKIT JALIL!! Oh mann..!

These people are crazy. Haha. Actually, I heard about that rumour a few months back, but I didn’t really put my hopes up too high, coz sometimes UNIKL nih ckp je lebih. Hehe.. and that’s from my personal experience. So when this letter came, I was so shocked coz these guys were serious. Wauu.. Bukit Jalil??

Anyway, they also included invitations. Usually only two people can enter the grand hall, but this time they gave four passes. Hehe.. sape mira nak ajak sekali nih? =D hehe.. But opps.. I forgot to say, my rule is Family ONLY. =P Aliyaaa.. tanak balik ke for my convo?? Heheheh..

They also included a pass for parking, and details for my convocation robe. Fuh.. Suddenly it became so real. I’m graduating!! Hahaha.. Bestnye!

Yesterday Aishah asked me about my convo, and as it turns out, I’m the first person to graduate from my batch of girl. How cool is that?? =)

I just can’t wait. Wooo. Wooo.. calm down. Hehehhe..

ALUMNI SMIH

Two three days ago, I was called to attend a review for my school’s ALUMNI. At first I was reluctant to go, but fortunately I received a call from a friend of mine. Since I didn’t have anyone to go with, I invited her along.

So we went. The rest isn’t that important. =P So I don’t think I’ll go into detail. Hehe

Anyhow, I met up with a few people. I once told you about me being in the forgiving stage right? Well, I set a few things straight with a few people. Alhamdulillah. What’s the use of keeping things inside when all it does is destroy your life. Anyhow, like Awla once said to me; “Life is too short to keep dwelling on such silly things..”. And I truly agree with her.

Two days after the review (which was yesterday) the AGM of ALUMNI was held. The reelection was held, yada yada yada =P hehe.. and the new elected President and Vice is now Ihsan Norkhari and Wardah. Two individuals with a huge load of potential from my opinion. I pray they complete their tasks with dignity and sincerity insyaAllah.

I was fun meeting back with some friends. And the end of the day, although I was tired from all the listening.. hehe.. I had fun. Munibah was a wonderful Master of Ceremony. She’s just a natural comedian. Hehehe.. Anyhow, congrats to all who had a part in making the AGM a success. God bless you all.