Thursday, August 09, 2012

The Real You

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim

Assalamualaikum WRT WBT

Salam Ramadhan everyone. I have been procrastinating a lot of things for quite a while and suddenly you'd realise how time flies by just like that. This blog of mine has been ignored for some time now and I see the need to make it lively again. Ever heard the saying "Guests bring Barakah when they come to visit?". I see the same thing when it comes to blogs. Don't get me wrong, this is not a quest to see how many visitors I have, it is not a competition to see who has the top ranking. This is my vision and my effort in spreading Islam thru my writing, with hope that whatever is written and read will bring some benefit to those who are interested to learn.

Rasulullah s.a.w said:
"When Ramadhan comes, the gates of Jannah are opened and the gates of hell are closed, and the devils are put into chains" (Sahih Bukhari Wa Muslim)

It is the 21st night of Ramadhan today. So are we all ready for the 10 last days of Ramadhan?

I think Ramadhan can bring only two things in people; either it brings the best in people, or the worst. We've heard so many talks and tazkirah when it comes to Ramadhan, but we can never say that we've heard enough. Therefore, I see the need to do a post on Ramadhan as well.

It's pretty hard to describe how awesome and marvelous Ramadhan makes you feel. Without syaitan around, you finally get the chance to know your own self. The real you -- without any influence from our enemy. Ramadhan is a time where you do things based on what you want, how you want, with reasons only you can choose. With the freedom Allah has given us on this blessed month, what have we done with it?

Four weeks isn't really a very long time. Pretty short I tell you. I can't even believe we are already in our last 10 days of Ramadhan.

Sometimes, we forget how fortunate we are. We forget how much Allah really loves us. We forget that Ramadhan is Allah's special gift to his faithful servants. We forget that Ramadhan isn't a burden, it is a reward to those who take advantage of it's precious time.

Let us really reflect (me included), how have we spent our Ramadhan this year? Are there significant changes from last year? Have we been doing more good deeds, more ibadah this year compared to last year?

Let us not be those who do not get the chance to feel the beauty and specialty of Ramadhan. Let us be those who cry when praying, who cry when talking to Allah, who cry when asking forgiveness from Him. We will feel Allah's love for us if we really open our hearts and our minds to whatever surrounds us. Let His love envelope you.

I got the privilege and honor to join a qiamullail organised by IKRAM Johor and Aqsa Syarif last week, featuring one of the young Imams from Gaza. And MashaAllah, I have no words to describe how extraordinary the experience was. The first time Imam Taha started reciting during solah, I was transported back to Makkah. I could feel being in front of Kaabah and praying. The feeling that seeped into me was the exact feeling I had during the days I prayed at Masjidil Haram. MashaAllah.

The first 2 rakaat, Imam Taha read surah Qaf. He read it so beautifully. When I closed my eyes, I imagined myself back in front of the Kaabah, feeling so close to Allah Taala. Oh how I miss that feeling. How Imam Taha read that surah with such feeling, made my heart skip a few beats. I found myself crying just like I cried when the Imams in Masjidil Haram made me cry. It was as if my heart knew the meanings of the ayahs being read, even though my ears didn't understand them. Oh how beautiful the workings of Allah.

After two rakaats, we were read back the meanings of the ayahs in Malay. And I finally understood why it made me cry. What a wonderful and moving surah. Such an eye opener.

For the last rakaat for the next solah, Imam Taha read doa qunut nazilah, and Subahanallah.. Even though the doa took 25 minutes, I cried to every bit of it. Alhamdulillah I know a little bit of Arabic, I understood the doa, and my God, how it went into my heart and stayed there. I haven't cried that much in ages. And Im so grateful to Allah for such an opportunity. Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah.

I miss feeling so close to Allah. Sometimes, there are days where I feel so far away and I know it's all my fault. It's Allah's love that never dies. He will always be there no matter how bad we feel, no matter how bad we have been. Allah will never abandon us. It is us that always forgets Him. Nauzubillahi min zalik.

Come on folks, there is still 10 days to go. Let's fight hard for Lailatul Qadr. We are the ones who will regret it if we don't try. So let us try. Allah will reward us for our efforts, insyaAllah.

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