Mixed Feelings

As I walk into the new building at Vision City, I find myself remembering our beloved late Ms Puteri Zalina Addnan. At the moment, I am writing bcoz of her, while listening to the song that reminds me so much of her. Each lyric, each note, each melody.

Moving into the new building does bring lots of feelings.

Excitement, enthusiasm, sadness, anger and loathing. All mixed up together creating what I would call an unstable individual. It kinda dangerous bcoz one day it might just blow right in my face.

It is exciting to finally walk into the new building that we have been promised since I was still in diploma.. I feel enthusiastic to start a new semester, wanting to work as hard as I should and bring my grades up.

But sadness comes into the picture where I will no longer be able to tag along and have laughs with Ms Put. It’s so sad to start afresh with no one there to brighten your day when it becomes blue. Walking into the HEP Office, no longer with the purpose of just saying hi or wanting to ask if everything is ok. I no longer have the enthusiasm to take note what is happening around me, the activities going on, the actions to be taken into account.

I’m angry becoz there are so many changes made by certain individuals which I know would never have happened if she was still here with us. She was an influential person, so now that she’s no longer with us, people just change things. She fought for the students, the students loved her. Now that she’s gone, there’s no longer a force to help us fight.

Its sad to walk around the corridors never being able to meet her kind smile or hear her cheerful laugh. Its also saddening to know for a fact that she’ll never be able to experience this new building she fought for so much.

Ms, I miss you so much. My prayers are always with you.