I had a dream last night. And it made me think about a few things. I’m always “thinking” these days it seem =), which is good because I used to just do things without really (I mean REALLY) thinking. I’m not going to tell you about the dream, coz it’s private. But it shocked me none the less. Mimpi; mainan syaitan. Yes, but what happens when it makes you think?
So, the question on my mind at the moment is; how do we measure a man? Or to simplify the question itself; what do we look for in a man?
It’s a simple question actually, but with a complicated answer. Everyone would have a different view on this matter, as I have my own opinion.
I used to have a whole list of things to find in a man. Like every other girl’s dream guy, he must me tall, dark and handsome. But as time went by, I realized that such characteristics only came in fairytale movies. =) Haha..
I used to think that intelligence was the main key in a good and decent man. I thought that if the man was wise, he would know what’s right and what’s wrong. I imagined he would be someone who knew a whole lot of things and can be depended on. But again, I was wrong. There is no use of having an intelligent man but with not even one ounce of akhlak. And “intelligence” is too general. So yes, he was the best student in his batch, but what about intelligence in Islam?
Another aspect I used to have in mind was Love. I thought that when you fall in love with someone, it doesn’t matter what else his characteristics were. Again, just a myth. Love it blind. When you love someone, you DON’T want to see the wrongs in them even if you see the evidence right in front of you. Even if you see all the signs, but you just DON’T want to acknowledge them. Believe me, I’ve been there. What’s the use of Love when the niat was wrong right from the start?
So what am I REALLY looking for? I just want someone who I can respect as a person. Someone who is better than me; who is more intelligent, who has a good and strong Islamic background, and can lead me face this world. Someone who will tegur me when I’m wrong and lead me in the right direction when I go astray. His world goes around for his one true belief.
He has to have an open mind like Ayah. Bottom line, two of the most important things he must have is Islam and a heart.
A relationship should not just be based on Love. You should love someone because of Allah. Not because you “just love that person”, coz that’s what leads to breakups and failed relationships; the wrong niat.
Allah created humans in pairs. Lelaki yang baik untuk perempuan yang baik, lelaki yang jahat untuk perempuan yang jahat. He also made the woman from the man’s rib bone.
A rib bone inside me belongs to my match. I just haven’t found him yet.